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Vote on 68,570 Clever and Funny Status Updates
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Samir
Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
Aug 29, 2009
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Sawsan
Love is giving someone the Power To Destroy You But Trusting them Not To :)
Oct 2, 2010
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Tre
Cop pulls man over for suspicion of drunk driving. Cop: Sir have you been drinking? Man: No. Cop: Papers. Man: Scissors, I win!
Oct 18, 2011
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Chadwin
a girl i used to date sent me pictures of her and her new boyfriend in bed together.....Solution??? i sent them to her DAD
Feb 8, 2010
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Kenneth
Mommy mommy am I a princess? No son you are an idiot!
Jul 31, 2011
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Rushabh
Apparently Bin Laden was found hiding in Arsenal FC's Trophy room, he said it reminded him of a cave in Afganistan, Large, Dark n Empty!:P
Apr 29, 2010
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Andrew
A world without Shakira..... whose hips can you trust?
Jan 11, 2011
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Sebby Does
My English teacher told me to give her an example of an innuendo, so I gave her one
Mar 16, 2010
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Jaswinder
Lightbulb: SAVE ENERGY...how would you feel if someone turned you on, and then just left?!
Feb 17, 2011
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Rahul
I wish every relationship would come with the same tag as johnson's baby soap -
No more tears!! :)
Nov 5, 2011
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Moh
If the loser keeps his smile :) the winner will loose the thrill of victory. .
Jul 6, 2011
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Rahul
Short but Fantastic...!
"Miss the One who is ready to Miss anything for you":-|
Nov 5, 2011
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Bhumi
I'm going to buy you a condom and put it on your head, cause if your gonna act like a dick.. you might as well dress like one!
May 9, 2010
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Radu
By reading this you just agreed to send me $10. Please contact me to arrange payment.
Mar 20, 2010
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Abby
Spongebob, it's been 11 years, you're not getting you're licence.
Feb 3, 2010
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Edward
Apparently your not allowed to walk into a bank yelling “It’s my Money and I want it now!” Thanks a lot J.G Wentworth
Mar 30, 2011
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Naomi
WTF you telling people I like you? Well tell them I FUKIN LOVeE YOU :)
Mar 29, 2011
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Turki k
Officer to drunk Guy : "How high are you?" Drunk guy: No officer, its "Hi! How are you?
Nov 15, 2011
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Justin
is searching for the love of his life: www.mailorderbrides.com
Feb 10, 2009
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Josh
You Have Been Served By Da Butler (That is WVU Da'Sean Butler for those of you who were like what is he talking about?)
Mar 14, 2010
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Jimmie
Have you ever just wanted to kick someone and scream "THIS IS SPARTA!!!"
Aug 23, 2010
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Jacob
C.L.A.S.S- come late and start sleeping
Jan 31, 2011
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Pritisha
80% Of the girls in India have boyfriends The remaining 20% have brains!!! lol ^o^
Jul 15, 2011
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Upma
3 Dreams of a man:
To be as handsome as his mother thinks. To be as rich as his child believes. To have as many women as his wife suspects
Nov 11, 2011
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Moh
why people think they are invisible when they pick their fu**in noses in the car?
Jun 8, 2011
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Eduardo
Dear math,
Please grow up and solve your own problems. I don't have time for yours AND mine.
Sincerely, who cares about the value of X
Nov 13, 2011
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How the game works [x]
Contest
Every Tuesday a new Status King is crowned. It's similar to the game King of the Hill but for your Facebook status. If you get crowned as Status King we will send you a FREE T-shirt with your winning status on it.
Rules
- 1 vote per status per 24 hrs.
- 3 submissions per day.
- 1 vote = 1 point
- = 2 points
- "Make this my status" = 5 points
- Buy a T-Shirt = 25 points
What happens when a new contest starts?
When a new contest begins, the Status King is inducted into the King's Archive for the preservation and glorious display of their winning status. For everyone else, all of the ranks (positions on the page) are retained for the next contest, but the vote counts are reset to zero, and the battle begins for a new Status King! May the funny and clever status updates rise to the top!
Status King Game winners are treated like royalty! [x]
Each Tuesday night, the original Status King Game completes and the winners are recognized. Now they get goodies too from the Status King Store.
Prizes will be awarded as follows:
#1 The Status King can now choose between the original custom Status King shirt featuring the winning status OR 2 free shirts (shipping included) from the Status King Store. Also receives recognition in the King’s Archive.
#2 Second place receives 50% off a single purchase in the Status King Store. Also receives recognition in the King’s Archive.
#3 Third place receives 30% off a single purchase in the Status King Store. Also receives recognition in the King’s Archive.
#4-#10 receive 20% off a single purchase in the Status King Store.
#11-#25 receive 10% off a single purchase in the Status King Store.
Facebook does not permit us to communicate winnings through their platform. Thus, if you finish in the top 25 in a game (when the finishes each Tuesday night, please email your name and a link to your winning status to winner@statusking.net, and we will email you the Status King Store code necessary to claim your discount.
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